11. Time Flies

Today, a month after I arrived at Barclay House, a door-stopper has been fitted onto my door. I can now leave the door open all day and come and go as I please. It is such a small thing, a door, but it's also a big thing. I'm very slow to anger, and only complained very good-naturedly every time I had to call someone to open the door, (every day!). I am angry it was left this long though. It took me a month to get properly annoyed (upset, not rude), which I did this morning. It was when I asked someone yet again from the conveniently-close office next to my room to open my door, and they joked, "I'm going to start charging you." I just stared. You can imagine how demeaning it is to have to be let in and out your own room. Also, it's amazing how slow things can be to change if you let them.

As I was sitting in the garden, a boy about my age called TD mumbled the question "How do you find it here?" Then I said "It's alright". I asked him the same question, and he said "It's alright" too. He later lolled past me and mumbled, "Time flies". Too right, TD.

Earlier this week, we had a team meeting with James, my social worker. He was very nice and laid back. He is there to help me with organising things for the future. I told him I'd already been organising university anyway. The penny dropped for my physio that the plan is September this year, not the one after. She then came and found me later whilst I was using the bike machine. "You're serious about September this year?" I replied by speeding up my pedalling. She said, in that case, I should probably consider an electronic wheelchair for getting between lectures. I groaned. The last thing I want is novelty transport for everyone to crow over and gleefully play with. I know these student types.

I'm practising walking with parallel bars and lots of lying-down exercises for strengthening my hip. I can stand un-supported but not for long as I am very wobbley, so stand with my right arm around someone if in public. My family have been taught how to do exercises with me which they can do in the evenings. Practice makes perfect. I did quite a long walk down the corridor the other day, though my left foot keeps turning inwards so I end up walking on the outside rim of my left foot which isn't fun. I can't currently flex any of my left foot or ankle. I've been advised to get proper ankle-supporting trainers.

I've been told my speech is at the level where they'd normally leave it to its own devices, but because I'm a singer, my speech therapist said she wouldn't let me stop even if I wanted to. Today, I did some yelling at an iPad to measure the decibels of the sound. I have been reading poetry to focus on diction and breathing. My homework is to write a poem with as many 't' sounds in it as possible.

I have been doing more cooking with the occupational therapist, impressing him with my healthy veg (student budget) meals. I definitely show my planning and time management is fine, it's just the execution of the plan I'm needing help with e.g. chopping up the massive sweet potato, putting trays in the oven etc. Another key OT activity is doing the washing up, which I actually leap at the chance of, as it means standing at the sink. I can do more of this at home, where I'll be staying over the weekend. It's all flying forward. Yes, I want to go back to university in September.

Walking.